How to Vote Your Inner Two-Year-Old Out of Office
Does it feel sometimes like your inner two-year-old was elected “boss of you” and is trying to take up residence as president for life in your world? A subscriber wrote who feels a bit like that. She knows what she wants to create in her life, yet she’s resisting taking the next step toward what she desires.
Resistance is a long time friend of mine. Sometimes, I just like to hang with my peep, resistance. Not because we have anything in common anymore. Just because we’ve known each other so long. I resisted becoming a minister for 15 years. I resisted writing the fourth edition of Bounce Back From Bankruptcy for several years (my learning curve must be getting shorter!)
Resistance is a reflection of your inner two year old. Resistance is that old friend who never seemed to grow up, mature or change. Resistance breezes through town from time to time and always calls up to see if you’re available for a quick drink or a cup of coffee. It always tells you that you’re exactly as you used to be and always will be. And it seems resistance’s visits ALWAYS coincide with those times in your life when you’re getting clarity and are ready to move forward toward something you desire.
You know where you want to go. You may even know the next right and perfect step to take to get there (if not, we’ll cover that in a second!). Yet you fight taking that step (actively or passively) with every fiber of your being. It’s almost as if our egos are trying to convince us that if we move into this new phase in our life, if we move toward the good we say we desire it somehow makes the past wrong.
The truth is, everything in the past was designed to help you discern what it was you wanted. It all was designed to strengthen and heal and grow you into this now moment, into claiming this new level of good in your life. When you find yourself resisting and you know what your next right and perfect step is, ask yourself:
What is it I’m afraid I’m going to LOSE? What is it I think I’m going to GET if I take this action? What is the action FOR? What’s my payoff for staying exactly where I am? Then boldly state the following, so you can bring the resistance into the light and embrace it.
I WANT TO STAY STUCK IN THIS SITUATION. I GET A PAYOFF FOR STAYING STUCK IN THIS SITUATION. I VALUE THIS PAYOFF GREATLY. OTHERWISE, I WOULD POUR ALL MY ENERGY INTO CHANGING THE WAY I SEE THIS SITUATION, AND I WOULD TAKE A NEW ACTION TO GIVE MYSELF WHAT I TRULY WANT. THE TRUTH IS, IN THIS MOMENT, I WANT THIS PAYOFF ABOVE ALL ELSE. I AM CHOOSING TO RESIST MY GOOD SO I CAN KEEP THIS PAYOFF.
(I’ll lay odds there’s a part of you that is resisting saying the above because it goes against what you want – even though it’s the truth of how you’re feeling at the moment!) We choose to move forward toward our desires or we choose not to. Every moment, we are at choice. When we can honor our choice, we can recognize that, in each moment, we can choose again, without judgment for any past choices. when you see the truth about your resistance, it becomes much less appealing to cast your vote for this toddler to be reelected as ruler of your being!
Choose to take a step forward toward what you desire for just five minutes today. You can stand the discomfort of any new change in your life for five minutes, right? And if that’s too scary, then decide to make a mental step instead, by affirming an I AM statement about yourself:
I AM CAPABLE. I AM WORTHY. I AM SUPPORTED. I AM WHOLE. I AM MOTIVATED. I AM VALUED. I AM LOVED. I AM OPEN. I AM WILLING. I AM STRONG. I AM INVINCIBLE. I AM THAT I AM. I AM MOVING FORWARD TOWARD MY HEART’S DESIRE WITH EVERY BREATH I TAKE.
Pick an I AM statement, any I AM statement, and use it to replace “I am resisting.”
Now, what about those moments when you know what you want and aren’t sure of your next step? In these situations, ask yourself one question: If I wasn’t afraid of losing anything, and I wasn’t trying to “get” something I think I lack, and I was only wanting to experience and express my true, loving nature, what would I do in this now moment toward what I say I desire?
Then get still. Breathe in and out slowly. Let the fears and the neediness slip away in the out-breaths and allow the true next right and perfect step emerge. Take that step with no expectations of anything. And then repeat the process. Each moment, Love knows what to do. When you tap that still, sacred space within yourself, you give your dreams wings to fly!